Carolyn Magner

You won't believe what I've seen!

A couple times a year, I get loads that take me up to Toronto, Ontario, Canada. The Toronto metro-area is relatively nice and clean except that it's also known as the City Of The Driving Masturbator. You wouldn't believe the number of men (and women) who practice masturbation while driving around on metro Toronto roadways! However, many of us American truckers do take comfort whenever we see a guy talking on his cellphone as ...

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Mascara madness

Dear Carolyn,I saw a girl putting on her mascara while passing my truck. That's just plain crazy. What the heck is wrong with people?ScottDear Scott,Eye declare!Just say'n,Carolyn

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Knit wits!

Dear Carolyn,I assume the majority of us drivers do a smattering of different things while passing the time driving. But I was stunned one afternoon to see a gray-haired geriatric steering with her forearms while her hands were working a pair of knitting needles! My mother is a "knit wit", too, so I know it is possible to attend to the task at hand for long stretches without having to look at the project too ...

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Terrible teens

Dear Carolyn,I’m having a hard time with my twin teenage daughters. They are perfect angels when I’m in town but as soon as I go back on the road, they start acting up. They are driving my wife crazy and I feel so helpless. My wife is a great mom but she’s at the end of her rope. Last week she caught them smoking!Teenagers are hard enough but with an absentee dad, it seems even ...

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Driving under the influence

Dear Carolyn,I can’t believe it! My new girlfriend is gorgeous, smart, funny and a blast to be around. Just thinking about her makes me start grinning. I’ve never felt like this about anyone before. She’s all I think about and sometimes I feel like I’m in a fog. Other times I get filled with anxiety that I’ll screw this up. I find myself drifting off into thoughts about her. My buddies say they’ve never seen ...

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The art of flirting

Dear Carolyn,I’m a hard working, truck driving man but for some reason, I’m not very lucky with the ladies. I have lots of female friends and am well regarded in my hometown. I’m not the most handsome guy in the world but chicks don’t run screaming from the room either. I’ve asked my girl friends and they say part of the problem is that I don’t know how to flirt with a girl. I’ve hung ...

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Today is the day!

Dear Carolyn,Can we finish with the Valentine’s Day hype? Please move on to something else. Guys hate this day. I don’t know any guy who thinks, wow, today is the day I can really show my sweetheart how much I love her. Nope. We are thinking, what’s the least I can do to score?You should tell it like it is.BusterDear Buster,Hey, I know there’s some tit for tat going on with this most perplexing day ...

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Valentine's Day countdown

Dear Readers,There are only 3 days left until Valentine’s Day! Here’s my “honey do not” list.Do NOT buy the wrong size lingerie. If in doubt, leave it out.Do NOT sign the card with “love,” unless you love her.Do NOT buy any appliances, tools or weight loss products.Do NOT forget to make reservations.Do NOT steal flowers from a cemetery.Do NOT believe her when she says she’s okay with not celebrating Valentine’s Day.Do NOT be insincere.I could ...

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Who do you think you are?

Dear Carolyn,What makes you think you can solve my unique problems?Ray,Dear Ray,Because my dear Ray, your unique problems are just like everyone else's.I'm just say'n,Carolyncmagner@rrpub.com

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What a slob!

Dear Carolyn,My husband is a great guy and I'm so happy to see him when he comes home. The problem is, he's a total slob. You should see the inside of his sleeper. It's disgusting. I spend hours every month cleaning it out. He doesn't ask me to do it and barely thanks me for all the effort. He says it doesn't bother him, why should it bother me? Well, it does bother ...

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