Wendy Parker

Poison sumac: Solution to Middle East crisis

"Either the Benadryl is working its magic, or a profound sense of clarity has come over me. I think I know how to end the crisis in the Middle East."

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Returning with fall: Friday night lights … and clothes

"Fall is almost here again and I'm excited because (A) football starts, and (B) people start wearing clothes again."

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Eating for health and happiness

"The more you understand about the necessary nutrients and minerals your body's amazing chemical reaction needs to stay balanced, the easier it is to feed your brain."

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Too many meetings: Why things cost so much

Mr. Canoodle "has a meeting about the meeting he's in now at one-thirty, then he's traveling to the Fairy Coast to have a meeting about another meeting he had last week...."

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Does this hay fever make me look fat?

"I have never had such an extreme adverse reaction to the very air I breathe as I did the first time we went through Southern California..." and more from the land of the plugged nose.

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The difference between ‘hot’ and ‘beautiful’

"A beautiful woman is often pleasing to look at because she has an inner light and makes everything around her prettier."

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Hold the condiments, please!

"This public service message brought to you by someone who knows, because I suffer from 'no condiment disorder.'... Remain calm and carry on, and we'll all get through this together."

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Haints, spooks and flat-out weirdness

"And there's the time we were riding along in Arizona desert in the dark one night -- I was already nervous about being abducted by aliens...."

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Farmer’s Almanac of winter doom: Pack your chains, drivers

Latest get-rich-quick scheme: Full-service tire chain changing lane. "Just remember, people thought the Wright Brothers were crazy, too."

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Hard choices judging Overdrive’s Most Beautiful

"I learned more in the hour and a half we spent with these ladies than I have in a very long time. These women know their business, and they all know their way around a truck."

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