George & Wendy Show

Wendy Parker

Say it, don’t spray it

| March 09, 2014

Putting the P in ParkingIt’s no secret there are a lot of foreigners on the road today. There are a multitude of cultural differences, and often communication is difficult. These differences are to be expected in a country like America, where unless your family is a member of an indigenous tribe, we were all immigrants at one time. I don’t have a problem with the people who come here legally to have a better life, that’s kind of the whole idea. What I do have a problem with is when people come to America illegally for a better life and refuse to speak, or acknowledge, the language.

I’m not going to lie — I’m one of those people who get insanely angry about having to “press one for English” when I’m attempting to contact my local cable company. I know it’s probably selfish, and if I were an immigrant, I’d probably appreciate the effort of the cable company to make it easier to take my money. But the fact remains, we’re in America and the national language is English and it should be spoken and understood by those operating commercial vehicles on American highways.

We were at a hole-in-the-wall truck stop in North Carolina. The most distinguishing characteristic of this particular place was a huge blood stain on the sidewalk beside the building. Either someone lost a whole lot of blood on that sidewalk, or a wildebeest gave birth to a herd there. Regardless, it was a pretty seedy place and I was sticking close to George.

It was still full daylight, and as we were walking in, I saw a guy standing with his back to the lot, between the first two trucks in the row. I couldn’t figure out what he was doing, until I heard the pee hitting the ground. The guy was less than ten yards from the door of the building, where there was a fully functional bathroom. I was immediately angry about his lack of respect for the places we have to live. It’s my personal opinion that the places we park and sleep are no different than our own yard at home, and we treat them as that.

“WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!!!”

The guy jumped about 10 feet off the ground and peed all over his own leg, which I found to be a perfectly acceptable karmic occurrence. He then started screaming at me in some form of hieroglyphics, and shaking his free fist while shoving himself back into his pee-pants with the other. His fist-shaking did not deter me. I was mad.

“YOU’RE A HUNDRED FEET FROM THE BATHROOM, TAKE YOUR BUSINESS THERE!!! WE DON’T PEE INDISCRIMINATELY IN THIS COUNTRY!! AND IF YOU’RE GOING TO CUSS ME, DO IT IN ENGLISH!!!”

The guy became oddly silent, and I realized George was standing behind me, giving his best hard-ass look. Pee-pants got back into his truck and pulled the curtains. I’m fairly certain he climbed into his bunk and prayed the giant red-headed guy wasn’t coming to rip the door off and drag him into the street for cussing his wife in hieroglyph.

“You can’t just scream at people, babe. I don’t like it either, but you never know when you’re going to run up on crazy. He probably had no idea what you were angry about.”

“Well next time, I’ll draw the idiot a picture. With crayons.”

Sometimes, tolerance isn’t my strong suit.

  • Bleck

    Sorry Wendy, english isn’t the “national” language. The US has no official language.

    I agree it’s really gosh-darn important to know here, though.

  • Charles Bearden

    https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=602779749816820&set=a.101486879946112.2248.100002544000858&type=1&theaterWhile I`m griping about lazy drivers ! How far ya think this guy got before he realized all his trash didn`t hit the ground ? Hope he did a pretrip. I`m that asshole that calls people on this kind of thing. But this particular time , even t…hough it was in my backyard (Pilot, Ktown) I had just relayed a load for an empty and was headed home for a weeks vacation. Drivers please remember when that particular Walmart says NO TRUCK PARKING. This is why.
    There was a trash can five feet behind this assholes trailer ! And drivers with pets. Please remember the next person walking through there.

  • Mark Mitchell

    yes English is our national language i

  • phil

    You talking about language well the drivers that know English still don’t follow rules I am tired of seeing piss bottles almost every were I stop trash drivers throw out with no respect Wake up America we support out troops friends family sick but we can not clean our act up what is wrong with keeping America clean so we may have the privilege to park with out a mother and son or daughter picking up some of the nasty trash

  • Pingback: Trucking News>> Say it, don’t spray it #iTruckTV – iTruckTV

  • Greg

    Regardless of “nationality”, there’s
    no excuse for pissing on a paved parking lot. The smell of sun-baked
    piss in a truckstop parking lot is overwhelming sometimes. C’mon guys,
    would you piss on your driveway at home???? Go inside to the bathroom!
    As far as the middle of the night
    pee, that’s what empty plastic drink cups or bottles are made for!
    Only, don’t just leave the full bottle sitting in the parking lot…..
    carry it over to grass or dirt or gravel and POUR IT OUT. Then put the
    empty container in a trash can. No one else wants to (or should have to)
    deal with YOUR piss. Have a little sense! And I did not say “common”
    sense for a reason, because there is none anymore!

  • Mark Chamberlain

    “What I do have a problem with is when people come to America illegally for a better life and refuse to speak, or acknowledge, the language.”

    I love how perfect this sentence is, in this particular article.

    Also, hieroglyphs were strictly a form of written communication.

    You, are just racist- try not to dance around it. It isn’t a matter of tolerance- if you think you have to “tolerate” foreigners, then you’re thinking of the wrong phrase to describe how you treat these people.

    Maybe you should take some time to learn a foreign language? Perhaps you’ve already tried, and American Simplified English is just the bees-knees when it comes to getting your mental bile out in to the world. Perhaps you don’t need to, because this is ‘Murka, and durn them for’ners for comin’ on ta our soil.

    Just, maybe stick to tweets? I’m certain that the dose of you that this world needs, is less than 140 characters.

  • Mark Chamberlain
  • Clyde

    You are right on the money Wendy!! Pay no mind to the nay-sayers.
    How far do you think they would get in a foreign country speaking English in the job market? Plus, it makes no difference what language you speak, there is no excuse for pi$$in” in the parking lot.

  • Steve

    Sorry Bleck, yes it is.

  • Steve

    My local KW dealer will no longer work on the trucks of a certain company who employs many of our turban wearing friends. It seems some of their drivers had cut holes in the corners of their sleepers for peein’ and poopin’. These trucks were not too pleasant to get under.

  • Wayne Pain

    Yeah, there’s plenty of US born English speaking Caucasians peeing on the ground. This guy’s nationality and language may have served as an additional annoyance to you because you don’t understand any other language than English, and his race might have annoyed you because he wasn’t your same race, and the fact that you have to push a button on your phone to hear English when you make a phone call also annoys you, might tell you that you are intolerant to other people’s race, language, and origins in the world.

    I do not consider myself a racist, but I do take offense when my family’s contributions to this country are not considered. Having said that, you don’t know when you are talking to someone, what their contribution to the USA is or has been based on their skin color or language. The fact is that any person working here is contributing, paying taxes, and supporting the US economy.

    Your story would be more understandable from my point of view if you had focused on the fact that the person wasn’t using a bathroom when there was one so close by, and they were urinating in an area where other people will have to walk through and smell. No matter what their nationality or origins, the fact that they had absolutely no consideration for the other people in the parking lot is the main problem here.

  • Mikel

    The United States of America does not have an “official” language. Although English is the language predominantly spoken in the U.S., it is not the official language. That is why we have to “Press 1 for English” and so on. There are some states that have listed English as their official language, but not the nation as a whole.