Wendy Parker

The pemmican prophecy

In which Wendy tries out a recipe for the super-food of the native Americans: "I took a big, healthy, life sustaining bite of pemmican, and immediately discovered that I'm not ready for the apocalypse." ...

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Ode to those who make us laugh

"Here's to the people who make us laugh when we'd rather cry, especially my sweet husband. Make someone laugh today -- you never know who feels like the cat's been sucking on their hair, and you may just keep a trucker from crying."

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Can’t sneak away from trucking

In which Wendy steals off at 4 a.m. from her daughter's hospital bedside for an illicit smoke in an underground parking garage, only to find out "you can't do anything without a trucker. Not even sneak off to smoke a cigarette."

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When you really, really, really love truckin’

Meet Susanne Taylor and her son, Josh, whose "love for big trucks is unparalleled. Their field trips to the travel plaza are specifically for Josh to be among the “big boys,” and see as many trucks as he can see. He's amassed a group of trucking buddies who love him as much as he loves them."

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Does he bring the babies?

Sometimes, educating is hard. "“They come on a truck, like almost everything in the store. My husband and I have a lot of friends who haul produce, the truckers bring all this stuff.” Not the babies, of course...

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You get what you pay for

The maxim might not always be true. "Bad websites. Scammers. They're out there, and if you see them pass the information along or report it."

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Letters to the future

"It's kind of hard to decide what to tell someone in the future. As nutty as the world is today, there's really not much advice to give, except for, 'Keep your head on a swivel.' While it's excellent advice, it's not really profound."

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Notes on vernacular

“Keep yer panties on, son, I got a full-grown with a capture in the breakdown, I'll mosey out of your way momentarily... stand by.” Feel me?

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Mystery Science Theater Super Bowl 2017

George, as Wendy's running commentary continues: “I've listened to Mystery Science Theater Super Bowl for almost three hours, do you think we could just be quiet during overtime?”

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Do it right, even if it’s ugly

Bit of tribute to the open-deckers running high, wide, heavy, ugly: "Sometimes you get to be Elvis, and sometimes you're Jed Clampett, but both of them pay the bills. Do it right, even if it's ugly."

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