Go or Stay?

| November 03, 2009

Dear Carolyn,

I want to end my relationship with my girlfriend but I can’t seem to get it done. Every time I bring up my dissatisfaction with our relationship, she talks me down from the ledge. I agree that we are perfectly compatible, have the same values and interests and generally get along well. I also agree that we’d make good parents and could grow old together. But what she doesn’t get is that I’ve never had the chance to date around and enjoy the single life like all my other friends do. We met in high school and I’ve never been with another girl. It’s time to either break up or figure out how to get happy.
Is it so wrong to want a little freedom?
Jamie

Dear Jamie,
No. Yes. I don’t know. I will say this. The single life is not all it’s cracked up to be. Most of my letters come from people longing for a perfectly compatible partner they can grow old with.
That said, in all fairness to your girlfriend, you should cut her loose. She ought to see it coming since you’ve tried and failed to break up before. Be prepared for it to be less fun than you think it will be. But then again, if you aren’t feeling it, it’s probably not there. No amount of talking you down from the ledge is going to replace that loving feeling.
I’m just say’n