Holidays and the single life

| November 30, 2009

Dear Carolyn,

I’ve been divorced for 20 years and am happily single. The life of a long-haul trucker is hard on relationships and families. While I have met great gals over the years, I’ve been upfront with my lack of interest in anything permanent. Mostly, they seem okay with the idea but in the end, they leave for someone who wants to commit. I get that.
The only time I’m a little unsure about my choice to stay single is over the holidays. It’s all about families and you can’t get away from it. I don’t want anyone’s pity because it’s my own choice.
Sometimes, I wonder if I’m wrong and everyone else is right.
What do you think?
Dave

Dear Dave,
I don’t think everyone is suited for marriage. You gave it a try and it wasn’t for you. Plenty of my letters come from people who are unhappy and lonely in their marriage but don’t want to leave because they are afraid of the single life. You seem to have made peace with your choices and that is a good thing. So, what can we do about all the sappy Christmas songs, movies and advertisements relentlessly bombarding us with their unrealistic Holiday expectations?
Nothing.
Just let it drift by.
Just a thought though. Consider doing volunteer work over the holidays. Work at a homeless shelter or deliver toys for tots. Create your own version of Christmas that suits you.
Just say’n,
Carolyn

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