Going buff

By Carolyn Magner
[email protected]

Dear Carolyn,
I’m trying to turn over a new leaf this year. I want to lose weight, eat better food and start an exercise program. The problem is that my wife says she likes me the way I am. I’d be flattered, but deep down I’m afraid she just wants me to look this way so she’ll look better than me. I know that sounds crazy. Why else would she not support my efforts to improve myself?
Wondering in Waco,

Dear Wonder Boy,
Change is uncomfortable. Change makes people worry, get anxious, think strange thoughts. There’s no telling what she’s thinking. But here’s what I think. Go ahead and get going on your new health program. Ask her to join you. Include her in the process. Both of you get all buff and gorgeous together. If she doesn’t want to, that’s fine, too. You go ahead anyway – just for the health of it.

I’m just say’n.

Dear Carolyn,
My girlfriend and I have been dating for about two years now. I thought things were going along just swell, but suddenly, out of the blue, she broke up with me right after the holidays. Of course, she let me buy her lots of nice presents, cook a big Christmas Day dinner and take her out on New Year’s Eve. But after that, she told me that she didn’t feel the love anymore. I begged her to tell me what I did wrong, but she keeps insisting that it’s not me, it’s her.

What do you think?

Dear Jack,
Oh my goodness, are chicks still using the old “it’s not you, it’s me,” line? Sorry, my friend, but it IS you. That’s OK though. Pick yourself up and move on down the road.

I’m just say’n.

Dear Carolyn,
My mother-in-law has never liked me. Now that we have a baby, she’s suddenly acting like she’s my best friend. Well, guess what? I’m not playing her game. I’m going to give back to her what she’s dished out to me all these years. I was never good enough for her son? Well, now that I hold all the cards, we’ll see who wins this battle!
Revenge is sweet.

Dear Polly,
Oh, yes. I love me some revenge! But the sweet only lasts as long as a powdered donut in a drivers’ lounge. You can hold your baby hostage. But you shouldn’t. It’s not the baby’s fault that you and the MIL don’t like each other. Who knows, she might be a great grandma. My advice is to suck it up, put your anger behind you and let her play grandma. Of course, if she’s not a very excellent grandmother, feel free to revert back to plan A.

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I’m just say’n.

Dear Carolyn,
I am having a little flirtation with a guy at work. He’s a really terrific fellow, good looking, nice and he makes me laugh. My husband is always gone and when he’s home, he’s on the couch, remote in hand. I’m smart enough to know that this can’t lead anywhere, but a girl just wants to have fun. Right?

Can’t women and men be friends without going further?
Suzy Q

Dear Suzy,
I don’t know – can you? Trust me. Temptation usually comes in through a door you’ve left open. Either shut the door or go ahead and open it wide. Don’t count on that little crack to stay put.

I’m just say’n.

Carolyn Magner is not a professional therapist, shrink or even a very nice person. Her advice is meant to entertain you, not solve your terrible, desperate problems. Nothing shocks her. If you are really in trouble, please call someone who has gone to school for a long time. E-mail her at [email protected].