I haven’t slept in 14 years.
OK, that’s a filthy lie. It hasn’t been anywhere near 14 years, it just seems like it. We’ve been back and forth to the hospital a lot the past week. I have a difficult time sleeping there because as nice as Jewish Hospital in Cincinnati is, sleeping on a recliner that catapults you across the room if you dare lean forward the tiniest bit is extremely dangerous for someone who is likely to jump up when a bell or whistle goes off in the middle of the night. I alarmed the floor nurses by flinging myself through the air like a trapeze artist without a trapeze every time they opened the door, and annoyed my daughter by inadvertently firing pillows and blankets around the room multiple times.
Suffice it to say I’m not a great bunk mate for a hospital stay.
Of course, I haven’t rested any better at home. I clutch my phone and check to see if I’ve missed a call from the hospital about 99 times an hour. I was extremely distraught when I accidentally grabbed the TV remote instead of my phone, and couldn’t get the screen to light up. Thank goodness for George in these hours of craziness.
“Well, great. Now my phone won’t work.”
“That’s not your phone.”
“Who’s phone is it?”
“It’s the television remote. You can talk to the TV with it, if that makes you feel better.”
“You’re holding it in your other hand.”
“I knew that.”
“You might want to get some rest.”
“Nah, I’m fine.”
“You look like the cat’s been sucking on your hair.”
And instead of being mad, or crying because my hair had a cat-suckled look, I laughed. I laughed because “Has the cat been sucking on your hair?” has been a long standing phrase of concern in our warped little family, and it’s funny, it’s familiar and above all, it was true. I felt like the cat had been sucking on my hair. I needed to rest, and laughing about it released just as much angst as crying about it would have.
Here’s to the people who make us laugh when we’d rather cry, especially my sweet husband. Make someone laugh today — you never know who feels like the cat’s been sucking on their hair, and you may just keep a trucker from crying.
Ain’t nobody got time for that.