The difference between ‘hot’ and ‘beautiful’

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Updated Sep 5, 2013
“Throw a few hunks in with the honeys.” –Wendy Parker to trucking-show exhibitor personnel…“Throw a few hunks in with the honeys.” –Wendy Parker to trucking-show exhibitor personnel…

Dallas is a hotbed for good-looking women, especially when one of the biggest truck shows of the year is in town. Companies employ scads of gorgeous ladies to hand out their swag and pose for pictures with a thousand grinning truckers. It’s a marketing thing, hot woman = hot product = you’re a badass if you use it. It’s actually not just a man thing, and I’d like to strongly suggest to the exhibitors that there are plenty enough women in the industry and at the shows to throw a few hunks in with the honeys. I can appreciate a pretty girl, but if you want me to remember the name of your product, have Alcide Herveaux from the show “True Blood” hand me a hat. (His real name is Joe Manganiello and he is a testament to divine intervention.)

I read some comments on the Facebook page regarding Overdrive‘s Most Beautiful that I’ve debated on whether or not to even mention, and George told me not to, but I can’t help it. I think there needs to be a clarification made regarding the Most Beautiful contest. I’m not going to go on about how awesome the finalists were — if you haven’t gotten that from the four hundred articles written about them, you’re not going to. That’s not the point. The point is, beautiful has a multifaceted definition – there is more than one dimension to a woman who is truly beautiful. A hot woman is pleasing to look at, has a bitchin’ body and is often employed at truck shows to hand out hats. A beautiful woman is often pleasing to look at because she has an inner light and makes everything around her prettier. The two are definitely not exclusive of one another, but the contest wasn’t titled, “Overdrive’s Hottest Beauties of Trucking.” Granted, Carolyn (who originated the contest) and the judges from this year all agreed the next contest might be titled something like, “Overdrive’s Outstanding Women of Trucking,” so as not to confuse and disappoint those who can’t discern the difference between “hot” and “beautiful.” We never want to be misleading or disappointing. (Mike actually came up with that particular name — I have to give him credit for it, because I think it’s perfect.)

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George is pretty good about gawking — we’ve been together almost 20 years, and more often than not, I’m the one pointing out a pretty girl to him. I don’t mind him looking at the menu, as long as he always orders home fries. There was one girl at the show in particular I noticed we kept circling and he kept taking pictures of. She really was stunning, a beautiful young Hispanic girl, but enough was enough.

“Uh, how many shots are you going to need of her?”

“She has on a different outfit today.”

“Does she now? Who’s she working for?”

“I have no idea. Tires. Someone selling tires. I’ll stop and see if she’ll give me a card.”

“She’ll give you a cold sore.”

“That’s not very nice.”

“My nice was used up on the 50th frame of her. Ask her boss for a card.”

“You’re the one who pointed her out to me in the first place.”

“I’m fairly certain you’d have noticed.”

“She has nice outfits.”

“Is that what they’re called? Can I get my outfits done for my 50th birthday?”

“Hey, I think there are firemen over there.”

“Do they have nice outfits?”

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